“In every neighborhood there is one house that adults whisper about and children cross the street to avoid.”

The People Under The Stairs is one of my favorite underrated films. It has everything you can want out of a semi B horror film. It’s weird, it’s kooky, it radiates 90′s awesomeness, and it’s filled with lines such as this: “Thirteenth birthday is unlucky anyway. Too old to get tit, too young to get ass… fucked either way”. 

In 1991 Wes Craven took a break from his A Nightmare On Elm Street role. He managed to put together a movie that was a twist on the theme of crazy families (a la Texas Chainsaw Massacre), all while somehow predicting the future of The Collector. The result was a well made campy horror movie that circled around a young boy named Fool, a mute boy named Roach, a painfully sheltered girl named Alice, and two insane adults only referred to as mommy and daddy. Mommy and daddy had a secret, and that secret was the large amount of children they kidnapped and kept in the basement and tortured in hopes of finding the perfect child to pass as their own. Not only were mommy and daddy certified loony tunes and more disturbingly, brother and sister, their whole house was one big booby trap. A giant booby trap that devoured any potential robber, and forced them to be mommy and daddy’s new play toy. This is when Fool comes into play with his determination to find said gold and make it out of this diabolical house alive. Amusement ensues, and we are left with some oddly hysterical scenes, cheesy 90′s spunk, and some one-liners that will make you want to put this movie into your regular rotation. So while you plan your People Under The Stairs party, I will leave you with some party food that resembles some of the unfortunate sludge fed to the kidnapped few, but with a lot better taste. It’s totally up to you if you want to share or not though.

Mommy And Daddy Dip

This Chili Cheese dip will also always have a special place in my heart, as I’ve been making it since I was able to hold a spoon. Since I’ve learned to do more than hold a spoon, this recipe has grown into the dream inducing, taste buds cutting, punch of flavor that it is today. Want to make it vegetarian friendly? Just sub out some soyrizo or another similar product in its place. This recipe also works just as well if you eliminate the chorizo. 

Ingredients:

-       1 Can Refried Beans

-       1 (8 oz) Cream Cheese, softened

-       1 Jar Queso Dip

-       ½ White Onion, Chopped

-       4 Green Onions, Diced

-       2 Chorizo Sausages, Lining cut and Innards out

-       2 Tablespoons Balsamic Vinegar

-       1 Tablespoon Brown Sugar

-       1 Tablespoon Olive Oil

-       Tortilla Chips For Dipping

 Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 Degrees F. In a small saucepan, heat up olive oil and cook onions on low heat and covered for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. After 20 minutes, remove lid and add balsamic and brown sugar. Toss to combine, and then return lid and cook for an additional 10 minutes. In the meantime, cook up the chorizo sausage on medium heat until lightly browned and completely cooked.  Turn off heat, and then transfer the cooked onions to the chorizo mixture and set aside. In an 8 x 10 baking dish, put a layer of beans, followed by a layer of cream cheese, chorizo mixture, queso dip, and green onion. Bake for 20 minutes and serve warm with a side of tortilla chips for dipping.

Serves 5