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Cannibal Kitchen: Your One Stop, Halloween Shop

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Halloween is fast approaching and that makes me sad. Yes you read that correctly, and no I wasn’t dropped on my head. The closer Halloween gets the more I realize it’s soon going to be over, and I then will be forced to listen to Jingle Bells on loop until 2014 approaches. Shoot me, and bury me in a pumpkin scented grave. This is about the time of the month that most people start finalizing their Halloween party details. Whether that is a party of 1 or multiples, I’m here to share with you some of my favorite recipes that will mix the perfect amount of eerie with edible for all of your party guests.

 

A Vampire Sunrise

Not only does this drink look bloody good, it taste delightful as well. You won’t even miss the plasma. *I found the glass I used at Target.

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Ingredients:
-Tequila
-Orange Juice
-Grenadine
-Ice

Directions:
Mix 1 part tequila with 2 parts orange juice in a shaker. Pour 2 Teaspoons grenadine in a glass and add ice. Carefully pour the orange juice mix over the ice.

Mummy Meat

Once made, I can’t keep these from being ingested by party guests longer than 5 minutes. It’s a modern-day, bacon crazed play on your traditional pigs in a blanket that is guaranteed  to wrap your taste buds into submission. Word to the wise, make more than one batch!

Ingredients:
-1 Package Hickory Smoked Bacon
-1 Package Lil Smokies hot dogs
-Brown Sugar
Directions:
Cut each piece of bacon in half vertically. Follow by wrapping each hot dog in one piece of the bacon half and secure with a toothpick. Sprinkle with a generous amount of brown sugar. Heat the oven to 400 degrees and cook in a glass casserole dish for 45 minute – 1 hour. I’ve found that that last 15 minute time frame really various from oven to oven, so it is important to keep a close eye on them during this period. You want them golden red/brown and cooked, but not black.

 

Hors D’oeuvre De Roach

There are a lot of flavors going on in these little roach like creatures. If you’ve never had a date, they have a nice sweet flavor to them. It’s a flavor that pairs perfectly with goat cheese, which is tangy (similar to cream cheese), and compliments the saltiness of the bacon and the subtle peppery flavor of the basil very nicely. Slightly intimidating at first glance, I guarantee it’s a punch to the mouth you won’t mind. Don’t eat meat, just eliminate the bacon and these are still a treat…and that’s not a trick. (I promise to never make such bad jokes ever again…or at least until next month)
Ingredients:
-1 Package Fresh Dates (I prefer to not buy manufactured ones. You can usually find better quality ones in the produce section)
-1/2 Cup Goat Cheese
-1/4 Cup Fresh Basil,Chopped
-8 Slices of Bacon Cooked
-2 Garlic Cloves, Chopped
-Salt and Pepper to Taste
Directions:
In a medium bowl, mix all ingredients except dates until well combined. Set aside. Vertically slice each date enough to remove the pits, and then fill with the cheese mixture. Serve right away or refrigerate.

Avocado Ooze

Oozing is not usually a good thing. I tend to lend that word into the category of yuck along with words such as “moist” and “did that tattoo hurt”. Ok, that last one is more of a phrase, but it’s still yuck nonetheless. Avocado Ooze is a light weight, super flavorful, cold soup. It has a main base of avocado and cucumber, with a little bit of spice and a creamy consistency.  I love to garnish with either a couple of whole croutons, or some smashed ones to give the soup a little bit of crunch. I also think this soup is even better on day 2 after all the ingredients have had enough time to fully fall in love with either, so making it the day before is recommended.

Ingredients:
- 1 Avocado
- 1 Cucumber
- 6 OZ Greek Yogurt
- 3 Tablespoons Fresh Chives, chopped
- Juice of 1 Lime
- 1/2  of a Jalapeno with seeds
- 1 Teaspoon Minced Garlic
- 1/2 Teaspoon salt
- A Hefty Pinch of Black Pepper
Directions:
Combine all items in a blender and blend until smooth. Pour into a container with a lid and store in the refrigerator for 2 hours before serving, or as I prefer, over night. Garnish with some croutons if you’d like. whole or crushed. Feeling even more crafty? Here’s a nifty little way you can serve this simple cold soup (Or any liquids for that matter) with a little more pizzaz. I give you the Frankenstein Shooters:
*To assemble the cups is simple. You will need small clear or green tinted cups about the size of shot glasses ( I found great green ones by Solo), and a bag of small fuzzy black balls (does that sound as awful as I think it does?) that you would find at a craft store (I found a bag for $1 at Target). Simply glue the balls to the sides of the cups to resemble bolts with a strong hold glue. 

The Heart Of Halloween

I don’t think it’s a coincidence, but everything wrapped in bacon seems to go first at parties. So in keeping with that tradition I came up with this hearty finger food that lends a little more substance for your guests in a smokey and sweet meaty treat. 

Ingredients:

For the Marinade
- 3 Tablespoons Butter
- 2 Tablespoons Honey
- 1 Egg
- 1 Teaspoon Smoked Mesquite Seasoning
- 1 Teaspoon Black Pepper

For Everything Else:
-1 Package Chicken Breast Tenderloin
-1 Package Maple Bacon
-1 Bottle Preferred BBQ Sauce ( I like Sweet Baby Rays)
- Brown Sugar

Directions:
In a small bowl melt the butter and add the honey to it. Stir to combine. Follow by adding egg, and fully mixing. Place the Chicken in a small pan and pour the butter mixture over it. Sprinkle with Pepper and other seasoning. Cover and refrigerate for 1 hour. The liquid mixture will take a semi hardened form, this is normal so don’t worry.

Next, pre-heat the oven to 350 degrees and in a large glass cooking dish baste the chicken liberally with BBQ sauce. Place in the oven and cook for 15 minutes. Remove and wrap each tenderloin in 1 piece of bacon. Then sprinkle individually with brown sugar and return back to the oven for 15 more minutes. After the time is up, remove from the oven once more and baste liberally with more BBQ sauce and return back to the oven for a final 15 minutes.

* These ingredients for the marinade will make 1 package of chicken tenderloin (6-8 pieces usually). To make 2 packages just double the marinade ingredients.

 

REDRUM Cake Shake

No party is fully equipped unless it has something sweet. I’m a sucker for anything red velvet. Maybe it’s the blood-red color, or just the fact that it’s topped with cream cheese. Who knows. What I do know though, is that when I put it in shake form my red velvet intake is at max speed and I love it. This recipe is to make one full-sized shake ( because why wouldn’t you want one all to yourself?), but can easily be made as 1 large shake and poured into smaller cups to make mini ones for party guests. 

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Ingredients:
- 1 Box Red Velvet Cake Mix, Plus ingredients needed from the back of box
- 1/2 Cup Cream Cheese, Plus 1 Tablespoon (per shake), Softened
- 1 Tablespoon Rum
- 3 Big scoops Vanilla Ice Cream (per shake)
- 1/2 Cup Milk (per shake)

Directions:
Bake cake according to directions, except add 1/2 Cup Cream Cheese and 1 Tablespoons Rum to the cake batter. In a blender put 1 big slice of cake, Ice cream, milk, and 1 Tablespoon cream cheese. Blend until smooth. If you want to leave the shake slightly chunky with cake then do not blend as smooth. Top off with a little crumbled cake.

*Baked cake will make at least 6 shakes. Don’t feel like baking a cake? You can always cheat by buying a package of red velvet cupcakes, and using them in place of the slice of cake and cream cheese in each shake.

 

And now I leave you with the end all be all of Halloween jams


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